It’s a common stereotype that men play hard to get when they’re interested in a woman. But the truth is, men don’t play hard to get, they just don’t know what they want.

The origins of the hard to get game

The idea of playing hard to get dates back to the 1950s, when relationship expert Elaine Hatfield conducted a study on the topic. Hatfield found that men were more attracted to women who were less interested in them, while women were more attracted to men who showed more interest in them. This led to the belief that men play hard to get, while women try to win their affections.

However, this idea is based on outdated gender roles and does not take into account the complexities of modern relationships. In reality, both men and women can play hard to get, and it’s often a tactic used to increase one’s own attractiveness or to test the other person’s level of interest.

The problems with playing hard to get

Playing hard to get can be harmful for both men and women. It creates an unhealthy power dynamic and can lead to misunderstandings and resentment. It also reinforces harmful gender roles, as it implies that men should be the ones pursuing and women should be the ones being pursued.

Additionally, playing hard to get can be a form of manipulation. It’s not fair to lead someone on or give them false hope just to boost your own ego or to see if they’re really interested in you. It’s important to be honest and upfront about your feelings and intentions.

What men really mean when they’re “playing hard to get”

So, if men aren’t actually playing hard to get, what are they doing? Often, men just don’t know what they want. They may be unsure about their feelings for someone, or they may be afraid of committing to a relationship. It’s not uncommon for men (and people in general) to be hesitant about getting into a serious relationship, especially if they’ve been hurt in the past.

It’s important to remember that men (and people in general) are complex and multifaceted. It’s not fair to stereotype or pigeonhole them based on outdated gender roles. It’s also not fair to expect them to fit into certain roles or behaviors just because society says they should.

My tip

If a guy isn’t reciprocating your efforts, if he’s ignoring your calls or showing a lack of interest there are two possible reasons.

1. He’s playing games with you and keeping you as a plan B while he decides what he wants, this means he is not the guy for you and some what of a jack ass.
2. What’s much more likely is he just isn’t that interested in you.
   
   Either way its time to walk away, value yourself and keep you dignity.
   
   It is extremely unlikely that he is playing hard to get, if a guy likes you you will know it!
   
   If you find yourself lost in love and need someone to cast their eyes over your situation, Contact me.